What went on?

The last I updated was what, 2 months ago?

April was a month of many exciting things.

What went down 3 weeks back in April, we went for Yoges’s Hen Trip to Hong Kong and had a blast. Seriously, I never expected that we could travel together without killing each other. It was supposed to be 5 of us but Shu Ling is currently in Shanghai for work and it was just 4 of us doing stupid things in Hong Kong.

I am going to put some photos here when I get the photos on my desk top, we went to Disneyland (Can you imagine, I never liked things like rides and what not), rode the Ferry across their waters, visited Sai Wan Swimming Shed where everyone got intagrammable worthy photos, and stuffed out faces with lots of food. Plus as usual with mel around, the alcohol never stops, with viv around, the food never stops, with yoges around, the jokes never stop. With me around, the complains never stop. HAHAHA.

the washing lady 

girls who like bananas hahahahhaha
They always do wine and chips at night, of course I skip the alcohol and we tried alot of weird flavours that Singapore doesn’t have. Do you know that Lays have different flavours in different countries? There’s Lays flavour – Spicy Ma La Hot pot in Hong Kong.

I was surprised myself over Disneyland because I never thought we were seriously going there. I should have known because Mel loves loves loves Disneyland and Viv was super ons about it. Yoges and I was just meh so so because we are not into that stuff, but we surprisingly enjoyed it alot. I TOOK 3 RIDES. Disclaimer, I NEVER take rides because I am scared to death and I don’t like thrill stuff. I gripped yoges hand so hard, and screamed so much until i was thirsty but the others were laughing at me instead? I don’t get it. They said me screaming is damn funny. So I am not sitting any rides for another 10 years of my life.

The only thing we didn’t manage to do is, to climb a mountain/ go trekking. We wanted to do Dragon back or Victoria Peak, but we were just too spent on walking so much that our legs felt like they weren’t ours anymore.

Here’s the crazy shit ride that i did not go with them. it’s a U and it goes back n forth. Okay i video enough already. they were super owned when they came out, those people who have high ride tolerance, imagine me? i’ll be — . 

we stayed for the parade thing and fire works. mostly i took videos! 

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Our ferry boat ride

Dim sum at dim Dum sum . 

victoria peak 

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I almost forgot that earlier in April, alvin and I took a trip to Phuket. It is our first resort/beach holiday that we ever took because we feel like its not that worth it to pay so much for a beach holiday where you are just … at the beach. We prefer much part city and part country so we don’t get so bored. And surprisingly again, we were happy and so relaxed, and came back so refreshed. I really wanted to go for a “away” holiday that was not bustling and also at the sea side, because i love being near water somehow, like the sea and stuff.

We spent 4 Nights in Phuket, it was so so good. We booked in at Como Point Yamu and it is the poshest hotel/resort we ever stayed in. I tell you first that it isn’t cheap for most people so don’t gasp, but I think we have come much in our years of working that we can spend once in awhile. Plus we have not travelled far last year and this year – far means US, UK, EU.

 i’ll share more photos soon! it really looks like this. 

 

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The other great news is, we got our home keys! We are going to be at Ghim Moh. We waited 4 plus years for it, its incredible to think how long it was and now that it has arrived, we are like oh wow ok. Honestly I never imagined myself to have my own place, how it will look, etc. I always loved big windows and thats only achievable in high end apartments or landed or not in Singapore.

Some asks why we chose there, its neither near my parents nor alvin’s parents. Our first ballot was Tiong Bahru Sale of Balance which we didn’t get and I think this was our second. When I saw our place being launched, I somehow knew that we would get it, it was near Church, and I had prayed for a place that was near MRT, and something else – I need to go check my diary from 2012. The location is a matured estate and walking distance to Buona Vista MRT, have hawker center and amenities nearby, lots of schools around. Later, Telok Blangah came out which is nearer to my parents, but to me it wasn’t as attractive and we already gotten a number to choose a unit and we just went with that. Alvin often says to me – why we didn’t ballot for AMK? he likes to be in his neighbourhood AMK, near his parents and convenient has alot of amenities. To that, I often tell him that even if people want to get our place also cannot. And even if we balloted for AMK area, we might not get either – although I would NEVER ballot for any there, hahaha. I truly believe that God had given us our home because we heard of many stories of not being able to get a number, or having to ballot in Punggol/ Sengkang where it will be hard for me to accept.

So, we have started our Renovation and i will say that it is even tougher then planning for a wedding. In terms of decision making, and pre-empting on what we might need to our living habits. Currently, we live with my parents in their house and we follow their rules and their habits. I find that during this time, it is a transition for alvin and i. We do have disagreements and expectations of each other but they are not as violent as I would think it could have been, if we had moved into our own house immediately after getting married.

So as it comes to the end of living with our parents, its a new beginning for us. You know people say their parents cry or whatever cus they are moving out, well my parents can’t wait for me to move out because my mom can have her own room and my dad can have his own room after that. Also they told me to take whatever I want from their house because they are going to do a major spring cleaning for their house and throw alot of stuff out. Ya they can’t wait for me to move out, and my products out. And on Alvin’s side, his dad has already moved into his room and sleeping on his bed happily. His dad told me like how he would repaint the room, all alvin’s cabinets will be moved out, and how he would rent the room out to 2/3 people so he can make more money. (He seems to have changed his mind now and just sleep there himself). Seems like both our parents really can’t wait and have already planned how they are going to use OUR spaces. Well, is that sad or what?

But this is growing up, being independent right?

And I also have some reservations like me being lonely myself at home when alvin’s out for night classes, etc. And most of the time I am at home myself during the day and also night if he comes back late. We are just throwing the idea around of having a cat but I am not sure how viable or how much work we want to put into caring for a cat.

But I have a feeling that things will turn out quite differently, after we move in because things don’t always pan out the way we think it might.

 

Marching On.

Wah March already. I remember every march, as the longest month in the year. It’s been a few years that i always never fail to think how come March so long? it has 31 days, and it’s like 5 weeks! Somehow this year, it’s already almost mid of the month. 

For Feb, i went to work a week as a teaching assistant for a digital marketing class. it was an eye opener to people of different age group as us, and how Singaporeans always feel like they are losing out or need to get big bang for their buck. I’m not sure what make us feel this way, but often yes i too feel i’m always at the losing end. Anyhow the month passed really quickly and the other was sitting at the salon for 8 hours.

Here’s the result, a much lighter head which i never done before. I told Caely (my hair dresser) that i hate how my hair colour becomes 3 different shades after while, bottom is dyed long ago, middle is the last time i done my hair and then top is black most recent. This time she gave me a bleach first then colour on, YES to not funny 3 tone hair. 
Can always trust her with my hair since years ago even before she engaged bloggers. Mom was with her first then mom recommended me to go to her. She’s at 313 Shunji matsuo. Her cut is always on point and grows out nicely. Even mel who didn’t want to cut there cus of the price told me later that her hair grew out so nicely. 

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The other out of the norm thing, was that a pretty cat was abandoned at our park. She was so pregnant and was gg give birth. Later she ran into my neighbour home and gave birth in an empty fish tank. One day she just disappeared and  we didn’t know where she went. Alvin was annoying the shit out of me by asking me every single night if the cat is okay and if it was taken in by someone or was killed or kidnap or ava came and catch it. Omg, i thought i was so happy when it finally was gone because he spent long time feeding the cat downstairs, stroking the cat, etc. I’m not a compassionate person nor a cat person, but guess i had to company him. 

there was once i finished my jog/walk in the park and he said i say bye to the cat okay?  i said okay, he went over to the cat n sayang the cat n talked to her and i’m standing there waiting… for 15 mins!!! i was so patient in the beginning 5 mins.. then i thought okay lah let him, cus i m a nice wife. Then it became 15 mins or 20 mins. Then i’m like OIE are you done?! It’s been 15 mins leh! 😂 

Another time he said he go say bye to the cat, i said okay, i go back first ahahha! i learnt my lesson. Then he’s quickly said bye n ran after me. 

So anyway, she gave birth in my neignours house, and neighbour wasn’t very happy and kept wanting to throw her and her babies out. Her daughter had to keep convincing her that untill they are older then can let them go. She gave birth to three little ones and i didn’t know that they can come from different fathers. Basically all 3 looks different, different fur and different colour! 

Mom cat really chose her mates very selectively, they seem to be all branded cats. 

They were almost kicked out, so J who i came to know only early Feb, linked me up with friends / cat lovers who had a network for other cat lovers and fosterers. Within like a few hours, i found a foster home for them not far away from our house. We were happy because they were gonna be well taken care of. Like… i’m not even the cat lover here, but i did it because well if i can do something productive and really DO something, instead of my neighbour complaining that she didn’t want the cats in her house, i might as well right? And also partly because alvin loves them so much, and care for them so much, it is better to have them well taken care of. 

And after that less then a week, all of them found homes. They took them home about 5 weeks old. 

There was one more but she was given away the day before we visited them for the last time so we didn’t get photos. She was a gray one who everyone was crazy about and wanted to adopt. Gray is quite rare colour and her fur was the long type. dunno what breed but vet says those angmo breed. White one’s dad is likely a siamese. Black and white one i have no idea but her fur is already looking to be quite long. 

seriously they all turned out to be so pretty, the white one has pink ears on top (see the second pic) grey nose and likely blue eyes. The black and white has black ears only but her face is white. i mean what are the odds? some cats have one patch black eye 😂

Anyway, although i don’t feel extremely  much for them, i felt like okay i think i did something good and meaningful. Perhaps have met my quota for being good this year, i hope Santa gives me a nice present for Christmas. 

And that saying, we are FINALLY getting our house keys in April, most likely. Alvin and i have been having a contested debate about having cats in the house. i’m not sure yet, but knowing him, he’s going to bring home lots of kittens and also offer his house as a foster home for kittens. He insists its half his house as well, which i do not disagree. So i have said his cats and him can use the common toilet and some parts of the house (strictly half) hahahaha. But if any, i think kittens are extremely cute and maybe they will alleviate my loneliness of me being home  alone next time. 

We are looking forward to getting our keys and inviting friends over, yes you are allowed to play with any of alvin’s cats and also free to take them home with you. hahaha. 

Unicorn Theme Birthday Party

What happened on my birthday.. 

I didn’t expect the girls to come and do massive decoration. And the crazy …. unicorn. 

Turning 30 thoughts.

Turning 30, I feel that the milestone is really for my parents. This year is also the year that I will move out of my home, and into a new one with Alvin. This is probably the biggest thing for me rather then turning 30, I would say is to move away from my parents and the room and house I call home for 30 years. My first thought was not about me but the people around me, this 30th. Mainly my parents, and my friends, specially my best friend, Alvin. Say not that much of alvin but he has shaped alot of how I am in the later parts of my years. Come to think of it at the end of this year is also the 10^th year of us being together as a couple,  we celebrated with our wedding with a bang, I am satisfied with it and I always hug him to show that I appreciate him heh. But for most part of my life, my parents and my best friend were the ones that was there, walking the journey with me. For that, I am so thankful and grateful that God has kept us together, kept these people close to me, and for giving me a whole family. Something as simple as having a whole family is one that I never thought much about until now, where we don’t think much of but is a luxury and something impossible for some kids, to have and live with both their parents.

I hope that my parents see my 30^th as their milestone, bringing a human being up, from the time I was a problematic baby and not a very healthy one at that. I think they did quite a pretty good job with me, raising me up, with values and morals. I say that they never discounted anything in my life, gave me all that I needed and even wanted. The hardest part is probably letting go of me, and letting me do my own stuff even though I still stay under their roof. Now that I am married, most part of my schedule and time revolves around Alvin and my business, we do most things together.

One big reason for me taking the leap into business, although everything was very uncertain was my parents support. Both of them say yes I should try and not once they ever discouraged me or told me that I was being silly, or asked me to go look for a job. I know, in the end even if it failed or I go broke, I still live in their house and eat their food. The other was Alvin of course, one who would have to feed me when we move out. Sometimes these people have more faith in what I am, and what I can do then myself. We all need these people in our lives.

For my friends, those who been through with me, know my quirks, accept me for who i am. And mel who’s been there all along, ups and downs in my life. Good thing we both are decent people and not havoc. I guess for that both our parents should thank each other that they raised us up well, and we found each other. We used to change best friends in Primary school, but little did I know is when two people have some sort of chemistry and find each other funny or interesting. I guess this is much like a relationship except its a friendship. there is no need for labels like BFF and what not to prove to the world or show off, but just something very simple as being present in one’s life. We have grown to the point where we dislike each other’s taste, but some things we can agree on. Mostly now, we agree to disagree which i think is the highest form of friendship. Now, we have known each other more then half our lives right? And i hope we will be still close even at 50, or 60.

Unlike others, I don’t have a bucket list or a list of things I want to do before 30. But it seems that I have done most of the things that people put as bucket list. I got married to Alvin, I travel to placed wherever I wanted, I started a business, I have good friends that stick by me. Health wise has been up and down, last year and this year mostly better. I found that as years go by, things actually get better although we tend to over think and over worry about the future. Perhaps as I get older, I find that if you want it you can go get it. But sometimes some things are not meant for you or not good for you. And life, it is hard to know or predict the future but whatever comes, if its opportunity, go for it. If it’s something you don’t like, leave it. I guess the best things I did was, One to date Alvin. Two to start my business. I hope in my 30s, there would be more of these best things I did and when I look back, I will not have regrets or what ifs.

Thank you Everyone who has been part of this 30 year journey.

There are some things I learnt nearing to 30, and also want to take it with me down the 30 road.

• Not everything turns out the way you want it to be but thats ok, in the end everything that is good comes through and you will be happy with what you have
• Patience, Time, things take a long time to flourish, in personal growth, in business
• Friends come and go, a few who will always be by your side. Let go those who go
• I struggled with this for long, wanting to look like others and be like them, better, more well to do, and wanting to be where they were. Everyone has their own path, so do i. I stopped looking at others and concentrating on myself
• Creating the life that I want to live – this is the hardest part and the most challenging part that will always be on going. It is easy to follow the crowd, to do what others do. To break out in thoughts and in action so that I can be living the life I like
• Go to church regularly because we all need fresh revelations and a touch of Jesus
• Do Quiet time, because we can get caught up with work and things and our soul gets sucked dry
• Celebrate occasions, because those are the times we remember the best
• Explore, Unlearn, redefine, relearn – Always taking that step to learn things I don’t know, not being afraid to try, not being intimidated by foreign subjects and experience. This is something I am easing into right now
• Take charge of your life, in terms of changing what you want, being better in things, go for courses for your career, no one will be more vested in you then yourself
• Find the right kind of love, and the right kind of man who will give you that
• Don’t do things or go to places you don’t enjoy, you can always use that time to do something you like
• Trial and Error, nothing works fine the first time and it is ok to be wrong.
• Assumptions can be wrong, but there’s always time to make new ones. I thought I liked something, or something was good. Turned out it was not too good.

 

To sum up, I am quite excited to see whats in store down the road here. And I think 30 onwards will be the best years of my life. Like how someone wished me “Happy birthday. 30 good, wah. I think 30-35 is a good age to be in, you are not too young and naïve, and not too old and senile.” Thank you, I think that is wonderful to know. Hehe. In my heart and mind, I am always still 24.

 

 

 

Goodness & Love will pursue you

Surely goodness & Love will pursue me all the days of my life, and i will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. 

Psalm 23:6 

Looking forward to 2017!

What is your life philosophy?

I met up with Shu Ling that day, she always tells me stuff that makes me think and help to straighten up jumbled thoughts in structured order. I took away some stuff she shared and told me. One of which was how to decide easier. I asked her how does she do it? She chose between a good paying job and a job which interest her more but paid a lot less. (more then 20% less). How do you decide? I asked her, because I m also always stricken by what is practical and what makes sense vs. what I feel.

she shared with me that the good paying job would have been what she wanted 2 years ago, but not anymore. It would be something she would be working hard towards to actually get that sort of job. she grown out of the job or what she use to want. & now she would like to do something related to society and give back to society or for social good. So any decisions she make for jobs would go back to that as a basis which will make it easier for her to make decisions.

For life, she said that she would do things to meet the belief of her being happier this year then last, and better then the last. So anything she does goes back to this.

I thought it would be applicable to me to know what is my life philosophy, what I deem impt generally so it would be easy for me to decide on things – business, life, etc. It would be a much more efficient way then to keep rethinking on decisions. So this two weeks I have been pondering on it. I feel that it would also help me shape what I want my life to be and how I would live my life in the next 5 years.

This is in lieu of me turning 30. A number isn’t a big deal but being intentional is what I want to be. Not just float through the years like the first 3 years after graduating not knowing what I like, what I want, what I need to pursue.

In Business, Life, Relationships, Personal Growth, Giving back to society.

I did share with her that I might then seem rather superficial because what I want is only to be comfortable and that largely will come from being financially well to do. I feel generally everything I do, is to be comfortable in living my life. I would love to advice pp – I.e giving back to Society but I feel that I’m not quite ready and apt for it right now because I have not reached a certain level of “success”.

She told me that everyone has different wants and different things that will satisfy them, If it is what I want or think what I want, by all means go all the way and do whatever I can and everything I can to reach there, and then see if it’s really what satisfies and makes me fulfilled/ feel achieved. And no one can say it’s wrong or bad, because it’s very individual.

and if I can’t decide or pinpoint yet how I want to do things – all the above, then try the “world’s way” means everyone elses ways and see if I am comfortable with it, eventually I will come to form my own opinion and own way to do things (live my life, business etc.) that I find resonates / peaceful with myself.

Does everyone have a life philosophy as well?

Some of my friends have – be kind to others whenever they can. Some are travel as much as they can. (one wanted to travel to 50 countries or cities Before 30, and he’s done it) Some just worry as much as they can- just kidding! Some wants to date as much as they can (haha) maybe not anymore as we are at the age of wanting to just concentrate on one partner. Some are having family – many kids. Some are to make a difference in the world.

The point of this post is also that I want to be intentional in living my life. I think I have been rather this year, and i know that my life will be more intentional next year if I plan for it to do and achieve what I want. Life passes too fast, there’s no number (age) of doing something but this quote striked me because it reinforces that life is precious and you can live it wild (not sleep around) but beyond your imagination and fears.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life.
– MARY OLIVER

Streamline and Focus

Hello, I miss my wordpress very much. Its so much easier to type then to Diary manually by pen because my thoughts move very fast when I write. I have been using DAYRE as well – its just a app for diary writing journal-ling down what I did. There’s a community there and its quite good.

I been wondering since last year what to do next for the business and how to move forward. I think I also been wondering if being a Generalist or a Specialist is good and been asking around. I think I am a generalist and it bothered me for awhile as I am not good at particular anything but I always think that I could just hire someone whos good at something (say in the future in a big company/business).

More imptly, I should just accept myself for who I am and also brush up on areas I think is important which is also a challenge to find out what I want to be good at.

I might also be trying to do too many things or wanting to do too many things and should focus one doing 1 very well.

I wished I was better at marketing but there’s only so much time i can allocate to each of the things I do – E.g. operations, etc. Sometimes I get really exhausted just doing packing alone or sorting out shoes to bring to the store. And I also want things to be “perfect” but it just takes too long and too much time. Like last mth Mel designed the welcome email for me and I spent like how many weeks deciding the text I wanted to change and in the end when I came back from Korea, I thought heck it just put it up. And ta dah, now its done – I can move on and forget about it. DONE is better then anything else – if its not perfect, I can always edit later; no big deal!

I am still figuring out what I need to do very well and I agree with my meeting with Farah and another lady (i mentioned in the last post) that I just need to do 1 thing well and everything else will fall into place.

There was another thing I thought for some time is to help others as well, I am no expert but I have a new idea thats non profit and sort of might be a side project for me that is not really a business. I tend to think backwards on how to monetize things before going down to the parts that I want to do. This time, I am going to try to do the things then see if it can be monetize, if not, the benefits would be even bigger because i hope to encourage side businesses and home businesses / owners, and also provide people with a network or a group that can encourage each other so everyone will not feel so alone. Most of the time these people are just 1 man show and feel quite alone (much like me). I hope I can get this up and running soon, and also people will join because they think its useful. In turn, I think I would get to write more/write articles, which I been wanting to do for awhile now. If you think this will be useful for you, please drop me an email! sarahtangjx(@)gmail.com