The Millennial generation in work

I met a friend last week, because his sister is interested to do something related to online shopping and asked if i could chat with her abit. I said okay – although honestly, I really did not know how or what I can help or advice her with. I am not like.. very successful (in my opinion) and not like founder or lazada or zalora or bonito.. you get my drift?

So anyway, she asked questions, i shared with her my journey and also some technical things like setting up a site etc. I hope it was useful and like a 101 into setting up online shopping for her.  Most importantly, she was enthusiastic about finding out and researching herself as well, not just spoon fed.

More then that, I wanted to jot my thoughts down about the millennial generation and work.

She’s 25, in the 1990 onwards generation.. and she shared with me that companies (for her, she worked in a bank before, so I assume we are talking mostly about banking and finance industry) do not have permanently contracts. They are all like short term contract based of 6 months or 1 year etc and they renew it after. She said she’s okay with it and she likes it because she usually takes a break aft 6 months, to go for a month holiday and then go back to work again. She does not like the idea of a perm role because it feels like being “stuck” in the job and can do other jobs.

My friend eyes widened and doubled up asking her, “You mean your job is contract?” Yes, even my friend didn’t know his sister job is a contract job.

My first thought was, oh if it was me, i would just continue working because I rather get paid then take a long one month break. I think 1 week would be sufficient for me. But I did not say that because it is me and my preference, but not hers. I don’t need to impose my ideas on others.

It is an eye opener for my friend & I because we still come from that generation where we prefer permanently roles then contract roles. It gives us a sense of security, as my friend said. And his sister said it rightly too – That nothing is secured, she said it with a matter of fact.

I think it really opened my eyes and mind to our younger generation (just slightly a few years younger then us. We are late 1980s, and they are early 1990s. There’s not many years in between honestly). They live in this society today where they know that nothing is certain and for sure.. they grew and are still growing up in a place where everything is constantly changing and evolving and they are A OK with it. But for us, we are still slightly apprehensive and still need time to accept new changes, new technology, and how the world works differently every few years.

She’s not the only one who prefers contract jobs then permanent.. alvin’s niece also works contract/freelance job although there’s permanently job available for her sector. She’s early 20s, out of poly for just 1-3 years. Basically, she also likes to work as and when there is a job available and then rest when there isn’t, instead of going to work everyday with fixed hours.

They think that having a contract job allows them to do different things, change jobs more easily.. and feel like they are stuck and obliged to continue in the same job for long time.

I shared with alvin this later at night, and he said well they can always quit even if in a perm role, it makes no difference.. right?

I thought about what he said and offered another point of view. Perhaps being in a perm role, gives a resistance to people to leave. And perhaps it is also about, always being ready and not taking for granted that the job they are in, they will always be in and always available. It makes them really think, if is this what they want to continue doing? I personally think the good part is, they get trained and have to be more “on their toes” and constantly being ready of “whats next”. They have to really evaluate if what they do currently is what they really want to and not in it because they get comfortable and go on auto pilot. I do think that many of us, when in a perm role, we just get lazy and don’t really think of what’s next, until we get bored or we need a pay raise or something like that.

On the other hand, I guess it is also quite sad if they like the job but unable to continue in the job.

Alvin raised another point that it is not so good too because they don’t commit to a career, and can’t be good in a particular thing. I think, it is always freedom (or something like that) that they seek. I’m not sure? I agree to a certain extend that yes, it’s hard for them to be a specialist in an area if they keep changing jobs every year..

But on the other side of things, so many jobs are being displace and replaced by NEW types of jobs that were not heard of before…

So is it really necessary to commit to 1 career solely?

Driven by the economy and availability of jobs, I’m sure that some of them want to have permanent jobs but in their generation (means today) “perm jobs” is hard to come by, it seems like many of them only can find contract jobs simply because the companies are not giving perm jobs, and only contract jobs.

A friend and my sister (both 1990s) also are on contract jobs – 1-2 years, because the companies don’t offer a perm role. That saying, I am sure that because both like the industry they are in, they would rather have a perm role then contract.

Why do the companies do this? Maybe they are scared that people stay very very very long and do nothing in the company, and they cannot lay off or fire them. (I think this is more prevalent in the public sector then private.) They want to only keep or re-contract them if the company has business, and say bye bye easily without paying compensation if the company is not doing well.

So this 1990 onwards generation just make do with what they can and have, and ride with it.

Even though we are only a few years apart (we are late 1980s) the 1990s generation thinking and motivation feels like totally different.. I think we were “luckier” then them because jobs were not that hard to come by, and things were less dynamic when we graduated. We grew up in both No Internet and Internet age, where we tethered between both, we had a more “balanced” and “stable” life in terms of career, society, dating, etc.

We still believed in true love and found love in school/person (not so much on Tinder and apps) and dated in real life, talked on phone and not only texting and virtually. These days, I hear that nobody likes to talk on the phone. They reject calls and say please text instead. We experienced stable jobs and get permanently roles where we think we are guaranteed this job for life. We didn’t have internet growing up so we played outside, read story books…etc.

Understanding the 1990s, their pov and what they go through that makes them what they are and their outlook in career, life and love is something quite new for me.. All my good friends younger sibling don’t seem to be very interested in things that were important to us.

They are all about “as long as i enjoy”. It’s not much about practicality, not much about stability.. not much about other things, then wanting to enjoy what they do.

I think I understand a lot more and it also help me to see that perhaps we also need to adopt a little of their mindset to survive and thrive in today’s society.

Like, don’t get complacent or comfortable thinking your job will last forever. A perm job is a false sense of security that we all got sucked into believing that we were set for life, actually in our parents times, yes maybe some people work 30-40 years in the same company, but even my dad got retrenched during the economy crisis many many years back.

And keep evolving with the world because nothing is constant (I know this is super overused, but maybe just a simple term is to just keep up with times.)

And it is also important to know their motivations or how to incentivize or motivate them at work if they are your colleagues or your subordinates.

Random thoughts on kids and such

A lot of people ask us if we are planning to have a kid, and if we want we should have children soon/early. I think there’s less people asking us now, and i always don’t know what to answer people on “why”. It is like an obligation to “explain” to people why you don’t want to have kids now.

The usual answer that people will say is “not ready”. And then there is the saying that, you will never be ready to be parents anyway.

I don’t say that we are “not ready” but there’s other things we would like to do first. Our focus and desire of our hearts will not enable us to put aside time first for something or rather someone else at this moment. Commitment is often a scary word and have a negative connotation but it is not. It allows us to pursue what we really want. Right now, we are committed to grow our own career and explore ourselves (like growing as an adult). So we want to be committed to be good parents by only having a kid when we can.

Both of us agreed that it is ok to have kids a little later and we will be more financially apt too (not later like 50 years old la). Looking after children is no easy task, and not everyone have the energy to handle a kid themselves or have their parents help with their kids. Although stay home mom look like they have lots of time but it is also not easy for them to handle – having the baby stuck to them all day and all night, having to wake up to feed a few times in the middle of the night unless your baby sleeps through.

Husband may be too tired and need 100% energy at work especially if it involves heavy machinery or human lives, for them to do night watch or night feeds.

Being a little slower then our peers at having kids also enable me to look at other people and adapt from their difficulties. One of alvin’s friends have his mother take care of their kid while wife works from home – it is a common misconception that working from home mum can handle a kid too, no. Because kids constantly need attention and there is no way you can work with them crying or climbing over your leg etc. Put in the time needed to feed them, prepare their food, bath them, wash their dirty clothes or change their soiled diapers.

At night he and his wife takes over the kid so his parents can rest, but then when do they themselves rest? They worked all day and then have to take care of the kid all night. Giving their parents a rest at night also shows that basically anyone who cares for a kid needs rest. Then what about them? That also goes for weekends.

I think being parents require some kind of sacrifice but it is also essential to take care of ourselves first, you know like cover some bases. Having kids and having a family is not a sprint but a marathon, it is going as far as we can without burning out. We all know burning out ends up in arguments and in some extreme cases, separation. Arguing about household chores are so yesterday by the time kids arrive.

I have been forming my own thoughts on having kids, and many buy car first and helper (not as many) have. But I think it may be essential to have a helper first. We agreed that it is highly likely that we need a helper, even now sometimes we are too tired to do laundry hahah but of course we do la, we still have discipline.

Yesterday, I came to this strange conclusion that we should hire a helper when I get pregnant and not after giving birth. I told alvin and he’s like ok. I am grateful that he shares the same sentiments after watching friends having kids. We are like people sitting on the side benches watching the football game but not getting involved. We will cheer for them, we will encourage them but we are not getting into the game, yet.

I see how friends who have helper seem less stressed and more relaxed compared to those without. Also, they take care of cleaning your house too.

Many people say aiyah give your parents to take care la. Alvin’s parents are already quite well in age, they are already grandparents – alvin’s eldest nephew is already early 20s. My parents, i think they want their own freedom and enjoy their golden years – finally my sister and I are more or less grown up and earning our own keep. They probably already paid off the house they live in, and what they earn they finally can use for themselves to eat and play, and whatever else. I think 30 years of bringing up 2 kids is pretty much enough.

That saying, it is also likely that our parents and us have different styles of upbringing our kids. (Btw, we still do not have a TV in our house hahaha.)

I don’t know why i am writing this, but I wanted to just pen down some thoughts after I told alvin about getting a helper when I get pregnant. If you are wondering, no its not so soon.

On what we both still have to do right now? Alvin’s currently still doing his masters, and me, I feel that my business isn’t that “stable” enough for me to be able to go on auto mode yet. So yes, till the time comes, i will update again.

 

 

Happy CNY 2018

Hello!! Happy Chinese New Year to everyone! Everyone had a good one? Especially Loh Hei-ing!

This year is the first year we actually give angbao? I think Haha! Cus first first marriage don’t need to right? Something like that lah.

We headed to my parent’s place on the eve for dinner. We usually don’t do Loh Hei because just 5 of us and there will be so much left over. Mum prepared steamboat and my dad bought a roast chicken. I brought some CNY goodies to their place because alvin & i won’t be able to finish everything! This isn’t all, but we were starving by the time we populated the entire table so we just gobbled up everything. Not sure why we were so hungry, i think i didn’t eat much for lunch.

So it was surge for grab app so we took a bus, first time taking bus back to my parents back LOL!!! It wasn’t too far actually, like in between 20-30 mins, had to change bus as well but it wasn’t as inconvenient as i thought!

First day, we spent the day at home and doing nothing. But instead alvin & i got on each other’s nerves.. hahahaa i’m not sure why?? I was still flu-ish terribly since 2 weeks plus ago and had to start on a new course of medicines and didn’t sleep well the night before.

Usually we don’t do anything on first day even when i was back at home (my parents place) and i don’t mind at all, and was happy. But this time in the afternoon ish, i started feeling odd and sort of like a left out feeling, thinking that everyone was outside and having fun while i was like so sad, no plans, no do anything. I just laid in bed most of the day, can’t remember doing what even! Not even watching much korean dramas.

Felt so gloomy doomy, i think it could either be me not feeling well, or some side effects of the medication.

Our second day, saw us hurriedly taking a few photos on the self timer camera and then had to run off because we booked the grab before deciding we had to take a photo! We are so nice in red, and a secret, we have been wearing this for 3rd or 4th year now. This dress, i only wear on CNY Hahahah!!! Alvin also wears his red RL polos (i think he currently has 2) and red burberry polo on CNY and National day every year. I know, we just … can’t seem to find decent red clothes lah, and just don’t wear red clothes so don’t buy many red clothes.

For Next year CNY outfits i seriously should start shopping now because it’s not easy to find nice red dresses / that suit me.

We visited 2 houses and here’s a photo of my mum’s biological twin sister. They aren’t close because they didn’t grow up together, but they do look alike? And i guess i don’t quite look like her daughter – technically by blood is my cousin.

Do we look like each other? Since our mum’s are twins.. we should sort of look like a little similar? I guess then it depends on dad’s looks on the other part or the genes Lol

Unfortunately , it’s always hard to take a group photo at my grandma’s place. But my cousin and CIL is back from NZ! One year passed so fast, he went there for some work/study thing. We stayed for dinner and it was fun catching up, hearing about old stories of our parents / aunts/uncle’s.

Younger times, At the old flat where they stayed, my grandfather kept birds and always hang the cage on the bamboo stick. My 2 aunts admitted to accidentally dropping the cage down to ground level (stayed on 5th). 1 said the one she dropped , the bird… died shortly later. The other aunt said she couldn’t remember because it was too tramautizing. So we asked my grandfather .. he only could remember 1 aunt “killing his bird”. He wasn’t angry though; and he said his friend gave him the bird and he sang beautifully. He asked the friend to come and check on the bird, but 2-3 days later, it died. My cousin (This aunt’s daughter) remember that there was a bird with a bandaged leg. We guessed they did bandage it up. hahaha Lol memories are so long ago but it’s fun to put together an entire history when different fragments comes from different people.

My grandfather went into the room and dug something out, and showed us… It was a medal that the bird won at a People’s Association bird contest!!!! Oh my….. i wonder if he was upset when it died and if he was sad thinking about it. We asked if he knew what happened to that friend who gave him that bird, he said they didn’t contact for long time. and lost contact. Ah Sad, no facebook.

I stopped one medicine (which is new) and continued another which i took before but that night, i couldn’t sleep again because i suspect of the medication i was taking causing heart palpitations so it has the effect of caffiene making heart beat excitedly to wake me up. So today i didn’t take ANY!

Third day today! Check out the outfits, my Zara TRF dress from years ago, gotta check old photos of me wearing this to determine how long. Alvin’s burberry polo also from years ago, which i remember we couldn’t decide to get or not because the size was slightly bigger then his usual. In the end we got it because it was a good price and burberry clothes don’t come by often at good discounts. I think it might be from the burberry HK outlet at Tsing Yi. Seems like it fits well now Hahahah!!!

Lunch at Vivien & Paul’s place, and it is Mark’s first CNY in singapore! i thought it wld be really nice to meet and him experiencing the Loh Hei and all. Haha! Steamboat Yummy and also finally i got to eat BA GUA!!!! and the BEST one too!

God must have heard my heart’s desire, and granted me them. i was moaning the day before why no ba gua at grandmother’s place, i usually don’t eat (it’s been a few years now) because i feel guilty as it has TONS of calories. But this year somehow i just wanted to. I think i hadn’t been eating much for 2 weeks and no appetite because of flu, so i think my body wanted to replenish Haha.

And then best thing, since Thursday, i been wanting to eat watermelon but none anywhere…today, at their place they had!

Ah many more more of these to come. Missing mel’s boyfriend (future) & shuling.

it’s amazing how, we never run out of things to talk about?! It’s like ah… sometimes you know you need a topic to discuss if not things get quiet and awkward, but with these people – no. Guess when you been friends long enough, you have everything to talk about.

Then there’s the Karaoke set, my gosh.. alvin went at it non stop!!! We also made mark lip sync to chinese songs which was so funny.

—

someone came to visit at night, aiyo so cute. I see a lot of dogs but he’s the first dog- after i see, makes me consider to have one. Not seriously but the thought of. I never ever had thought of having a dog before.

But after that he wanted to go home, scared his daddy leave him.

Turning 30 thoughts.

Turning 30, I feel that the milestone is really for my parents. This year is also the year that I will move out of my home, and into a new one with Alvin. This is probably the biggest thing for me rather then turning 30, I would say is to move away from my parents and the room and house I call home for 30 years. My first thought was not about me but the people around me, this 30th. Mainly my parents, and my friends, specially my best friend, Alvin. Say not that much of alvin but he has shaped alot of how I am in the later parts of my years. Come to think of it at the end of this year is also the 10^th year of us being together as a couple,  we celebrated with our wedding with a bang, I am satisfied with it and I always hug him to show that I appreciate him heh. But for most part of my life, my parents and my best friend were the ones that was there, walking the journey with me. For that, I am so thankful and grateful that God has kept us together, kept these people close to me, and for giving me a whole family. Something as simple as having a whole family is one that I never thought much about until now, where we don’t think much of but is a luxury and something impossible for some kids, to have and live with both their parents.

I hope that my parents see my 30^th as their milestone, bringing a human being up, from the time I was a problematic baby and not a very healthy one at that. I think they did quite a pretty good job with me, raising me up, with values and morals. I say that they never discounted anything in my life, gave me all that I needed and even wanted. The hardest part is probably letting go of me, and letting me do my own stuff even though I still stay under their roof. Now that I am married, most part of my schedule and time revolves around Alvin and my business, we do most things together.

One big reason for me taking the leap into business, although everything was very uncertain was my parents support. Both of them say yes I should try and not once they ever discouraged me or told me that I was being silly, or asked me to go look for a job. I know, in the end even if it failed or I go broke, I still live in their house and eat their food. The other was Alvin of course, one who would have to feed me when we move out. Sometimes these people have more faith in what I am, and what I can do then myself. We all need these people in our lives.

For my friends, those who been through with me, know my quirks, accept me for who i am. And mel who’s been there all along, ups and downs in my life. Good thing we both are decent people and not havoc. I guess for that both our parents should thank each other that they raised us up well, and we found each other. We used to change best friends in Primary school, but little did I know is when two people have some sort of chemistry and find each other funny or interesting. I guess this is much like a relationship except its a friendship. there is no need for labels like BFF and what not to prove to the world or show off, but just something very simple as being present in one’s life. We have grown to the point where we dislike each other’s taste, but some things we can agree on. Mostly now, we agree to disagree which i think is the highest form of friendship. Now, we have known each other more then half our lives right? And i hope we will be still close even at 50, or 60.

Unlike others, I don’t have a bucket list or a list of things I want to do before 30. But it seems that I have done most of the things that people put as bucket list. I got married to Alvin, I travel to placed wherever I wanted, I started a business, I have good friends that stick by me. Health wise has been up and down, last year and this year mostly better. I found that as years go by, things actually get better although we tend to over think and over worry about the future. Perhaps as I get older, I find that if you want it you can go get it. But sometimes some things are not meant for you or not good for you. And life, it is hard to know or predict the future but whatever comes, if its opportunity, go for it. If it’s something you don’t like, leave it. I guess the best things I did was, One to date Alvin. Two to start my business. I hope in my 30s, there would be more of these best things I did and when I look back, I will not have regrets or what ifs.

Thank you Everyone who has been part of this 30 year journey.

There are some things I learnt nearing to 30, and also want to take it with me down the 30 road.

• Not everything turns out the way you want it to be but thats ok, in the end everything that is good comes through and you will be happy with what you have
• Patience, Time, things take a long time to flourish, in personal growth, in business
• Friends come and go, a few who will always be by your side. Let go those who go
• I struggled with this for long, wanting to look like others and be like them, better, more well to do, and wanting to be where they were. Everyone has their own path, so do i. I stopped looking at others and concentrating on myself
• Creating the life that I want to live – this is the hardest part and the most challenging part that will always be on going. It is easy to follow the crowd, to do what others do. To break out in thoughts and in action so that I can be living the life I like
• Go to church regularly because we all need fresh revelations and a touch of Jesus
• Do Quiet time, because we can get caught up with work and things and our soul gets sucked dry
• Celebrate occasions, because those are the times we remember the best
• Explore, Unlearn, redefine, relearn – Always taking that step to learn things I don’t know, not being afraid to try, not being intimidated by foreign subjects and experience. This is something I am easing into right now
• Take charge of your life, in terms of changing what you want, being better in things, go for courses for your career, no one will be more vested in you then yourself
• Find the right kind of love, and the right kind of man who will give you that
• Don’t do things or go to places you don’t enjoy, you can always use that time to do something you like
• Trial and Error, nothing works fine the first time and it is ok to be wrong.
• Assumptions can be wrong, but there’s always time to make new ones. I thought I liked something, or something was good. Turned out it was not too good.

 

To sum up, I am quite excited to see whats in store down the road here. And I think 30 onwards will be the best years of my life. Like how someone wished me “Happy birthday. 30 good, wah. I think 30-35 is a good age to be in, you are not too young and naïve, and not too old and senile.” Thank you, I think that is wonderful to know. Hehe. In my heart and mind, I am always still 24.

 

 

 

What is your life philosophy?

I met up with Shu Ling that day, she always tells me stuff that makes me think and help to straighten up jumbled thoughts in structured order. I took away some stuff she shared and told me. One of which was how to decide easier. I asked her how does she do it? She chose between a good paying job and a job which interest her more but paid a lot less. (more then 20% less). How do you decide? I asked her, because I m also always stricken by what is practical and what makes sense vs. what I feel.

she shared with me that the good paying job would have been what she wanted 2 years ago, but not anymore. It would be something she would be working hard towards to actually get that sort of job. she grown out of the job or what she use to want. & now she would like to do something related to society and give back to society or for social good. So any decisions she make for jobs would go back to that as a basis which will make it easier for her to make decisions.

For life, she said that she would do things to meet the belief of her being happier this year then last, and better then the last. So anything she does goes back to this.

I thought it would be applicable to me to know what is my life philosophy, what I deem impt generally so it would be easy for me to decide on things – business, life, etc. It would be a much more efficient way then to keep rethinking on decisions. So this two weeks I have been pondering on it. I feel that it would also help me shape what I want my life to be and how I would live my life in the next 5 years.

This is in lieu of me turning 30. A number isn’t a big deal but being intentional is what I want to be. Not just float through the years like the first 3 years after graduating not knowing what I like, what I want, what I need to pursue.

In Business, Life, Relationships, Personal Growth, Giving back to society.

I did share with her that I might then seem rather superficial because what I want is only to be comfortable and that largely will come from being financially well to do. I feel generally everything I do, is to be comfortable in living my life. I would love to advice pp – I.e giving back to Society but I feel that I’m not quite ready and apt for it right now because I have not reached a certain level of “success”.

She told me that everyone has different wants and different things that will satisfy them, If it is what I want or think what I want, by all means go all the way and do whatever I can and everything I can to reach there, and then see if it’s really what satisfies and makes me fulfilled/ feel achieved. And no one can say it’s wrong or bad, because it’s very individual.

and if I can’t decide or pinpoint yet how I want to do things – all the above, then try the “world’s way” means everyone elses ways and see if I am comfortable with it, eventually I will come to form my own opinion and own way to do things (live my life, business etc.) that I find resonates / peaceful with myself.

Does everyone have a life philosophy as well?

Some of my friends have – be kind to others whenever they can. Some are travel as much as they can. (one wanted to travel to 50 countries or cities Before 30, and he’s done it) Some just worry as much as they can- just kidding! Some wants to date as much as they can (haha) maybe not anymore as we are at the age of wanting to just concentrate on one partner. Some are having family – many kids. Some are to make a difference in the world.

The point of this post is also that I want to be intentional in living my life. I think I have been rather this year, and i know that my life will be more intentional next year if I plan for it to do and achieve what I want. Life passes too fast, there’s no number (age) of doing something but this quote striked me because it reinforces that life is precious and you can live it wild (not sleep around) but beyond your imagination and fears.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life.
– MARY OLIVER

Seoul good for the Soul

I’m back here, to update what I been up to for… the last 10 days! Alvin and i took a trip to Korea – Seoul & Jeju. Jeju really surprised me because I really liked Jeju. Although I was feeling super tired and sick during the days in Jeju, I felt like it was such a serene place with lots of land and greens and sea. And i actually enjoyed the sightseeing – HA HA HA. NEW FOR ME RIGHT?

I am the omg i don’t want to walk type of person, but recent 1 year I think I have changed a little. After doing Dragon back Trail in HK, I felt like I start to enjoy scenery and hiking related more. It tend to tell me that even though the journey is long and far, during the journey it teaches me how to be patient and take one step at a time, and the end result – the view is worth it. But i really appreciate and learn more of the journey itself,i  feel like it shapes my character in a weird way, and i relate that back to me and my business.

So we took a nearly 10 day trip to Korea. 3 days spent in Jeju which was not enough for me. I actually on the impulse asked the host if she had space for 1 more night for us because i really loved her place – it looked out to the sea. but she was really full, so we just went back to Seoul as planned. I would recommend anyone who is going to Jeju to stay at her place, she provides korean breakfast and she speaks english. Its hard to communicate in Korea if they don’t know english and chinese. All the circles and the squares make my head fuzzy too.

Let me ramble on before I start on the Korea stuff proper maybe on the next post. So this trip, is something both of us really needed. Our last trip was August 2015, alvin been working hard at his job and he’s also achieved completion of his ACTA – Advanced Certificate in Training and Assessment. He studied part time at night classes for around 6 months before completing it in June. And also, he has decided to embark on his Masters that will start in August, so it was a good break for him :’)

For me, I been stressed over my business, wondering what next and how do I do certain things better. Also, what is important for me in the business and as a person – this will affect how I treat and grow my business; sort of like my values. I remember my previous work place manager, he always told me that if one’s mission is to earn 1mil bucks, 2 mil bucks, then you will be lost after achieving it. It should be more like, how meaningful your job/what you are doing, does it help the society, do you give back? I struggled abit also because a retail business is based on “wants” and not “needs”. I think “needs” are like food business like hawkers, fruit sellers, econ mini-mart where they sell bread and stuff. Things you need to live. I honestly got lost somewhere and just sit back and wondered what value am i providing to people? Why are they buying from me? Why I am selling stuff to them? As well as got caught up thinking of growing the expanding the business, and was afraid that it would just be all about numbers/money.

This trip – Jeju especially opened my eyes and heart about a few things. A general gist was that, we stayed in Airbnb studio owned by Isabel (The host) and her husband. We hired a taxi driver Mr Lee who was in the hotel industry before he drove taxi and take tours. Both of them inspired me pretty much more then average. I always loved to chat with locals when we go to any cities (the last i enjoyed so much was chatting with Maureen, our host at San Fran) because it gave us their perspective in life, in their job, in the place they are in and the situation they have.

This is what our accoms in Jeju looked like. the seaview is REAL.
Sign up via my referral link to get SG$30 travel credits : www.airbnb.com.sg/c/stang18
Isabel house Airbnb link : https://www.airbnb.com.sg/rooms/7331339

What i took away was that – If you can make yourself or your service of Value, I.e. it brings value to people, your business will flourish.

Isabel was a teacher before being a host, her husband designed and built the 3 storey house and also had the foresight that people will like this place because it had a scenic sea view. I am also curious (friends would affectionately say I am kaypo) because I always wanted to know what inspire people and what led them to making the choices and decisions. The location of their house was purely coincidental. They were going nearby to view a land as they wanted to buy, and they didnt like it so much so they drove further and around. They just drove pass the current land that the house was in and there was a big rock on it. Her husband immediately said the land is good, but she couldn’t see it. Then he decided to buy it, removed the rock and built a building there. She couldn’t give two hoots , and didnt even visit the place until after it was done. She said she didn’t fancy or cared much of the process because she loved her job as a teacher. She just saw the rock and then the building, and i thought that was pretty hilarious and amazing. And other people around the neighbourhood was so worried for them and wondered why this couple person bought such a small piece of land with a rock on it! I feel that her husband has great foresight and also had in mind that travellers would like to stay in their house. He designed such that the windows faced the sea, the staircases are outside (like a flat style) not a bungalow style and the rooms are studio like.

2 points here I want to highlight is firstly, she loved her job. This is something i found in the Jeju locals that they are so proud of what they do and they put their heart into it. I have hardly ever heard anyone saying that they love their job in Sg. 2nd point was that sometimes things happen for a reason, a coincidence, just happened and its somehow God’s plan. I mean what are the odds that you chance upon a great piece of land when you were actually disappointed in the one you initially wanted to view. (I am not sure if they Christians, but she left a review on my page that included “God bless you ” so maybe they are. I read other reviews she left for other people that stayed at her place but she never did write God bless to others.) But anyway, my point, you get it.

She told me – I am not sure why people would want to stay here. i said the view is awesome and you serve breakfast and speak english. She said ohh ok, I guess the sea and breakfast right! I said yes. And this also led me to my 3rd point – that if you give something more then others, even if others may be doing the same thing as you. If you go an extra mile, just a small one, people will come to you. When I was searching for places to stay in Jeju, there was many to choose from, including sea view and even pool. I was so inclined to stay at her place because there was korean breakfast provided and her pictures looked so yummy and it felt like her hosting was very warm. And of course, it was convenient too to eat before heading out for sightseeing, thats what i thought and it proved to be a great decision and met her. I am always grateful to our airbnb hosts who are open to chat with us and share with us about their lives and their stories.

Me having korean breakfast prepared by Isabel’s helper

And to the third point, when I was chatting with her, I asked if she knew what the other building used their rooms for. There was one or two other building just a few meters away and they could be doing airbnb as well but I am not sure. i was wondering if it was competitive to rent our the airbnb at her area because of the seaview and others did the same. She said to me simply, I don’t know and I don’t bother, I just do my own things. This taught me one thing is that, doesn’t matter what people are doing, even if they are doing well, better then you or not and if they are your competitors or not, you should just focus on what you do and do it well. It was quite a rude shock to me because I am always kaypo and curious to know what others are doing and how i can do better then them – if I am her, I would want to know if they have “better business” then me on airbnb. Then i learnt my 3rd point is – don’t look at what others are doing, just concentrate on your own thing. This called me back to the short meeting I had with Farah, a lady who on and off check how I am doing (sort of like a mentor/guide), she and another lady whom i just met told me that I will go down (fail) if i keep looking at others/other business and wanting to follow their style/ direction/what they do. So this really hit home for me.

Our taxi driver, Mr Lee had really good command of English (for a Korean). We chatted so much and he shared with us his life so much. And the best is, he knows so much about Singapore, and how things work here I almost had to ask him – did you live in Singapore?? How did you know so much about it! His customers are 90% Singaporeans based on referrals. And so I will refer anyone to him that wants to go to Jeju and need a driver. I highly recommend because Jeju is huge and public transport/bus are not very frequent. The travel from one place to another is 20mins – 1 hour.

Here’s our very kind and friendly taxi driver, Mr Lee Hong Min. (he speaks English)
To book him Watsapp: +82 10-9396-4498 / email:

He has been doing this for 2-3 years, his father in law owns the taxi company. But what striked me hard was that he loves what he does, he isnt “sian” of bringing us around like its just his job or  a chore. I can’t imagine how excited you have to be doing the same time day in and out for 3 years. He works 23-26 days a month. You know like how some people in Sg (customer service sector) give you a sian look when they are serving you. Mr Lee was so patient, so punctual. We said 10am, and he comes at 920. Like omg we haven’t even started our breakfast! And the best thing is, he’s not just a driver. He parks his taxi, and brings us into the sightsee, walks with us and explains to us whats the history, what happened, how it came about. He will also take pictures for us, tell us the best place to stand and also take scenery pictures while we read the sign boards and stuff. I mean, which “taxi driver” will do all that, he was literally a tour guide and even got us discount one of the sight see entrance fee. This brings me to iterate 1. people in jeju really love their job. 2. they give more value then just the service they offer

And he was always chatting, smiling and always ready to bring us here and there where we want to go. On the first day, i was so tired and i didn’t say I wanted to go back to the accoms, but he said you look really tired why don’t we go back and rest for today and continue tomorrow. At that point, we had just reached the sight see entrance and even got down the taxi. If I was the driver, I would not bother because i drove all the way here! I said ok and we headed back.

It also dawned onto me and i was quite amazed that they could make a business out of just hosting people and driving people. It looked to me that there was a need in the industry and you can always make a business out of it as long as you provide value / something that someone needs. For them, it comes out of the tourism and people need the service their provide.

So although I felt real tired and sick during Jeju trip, I liked it a whole lot more then Seoul. Maybe less people, more fresh air and the seaview from our room. Also what I took away and learnt from the short 3 Days.. helped me to see that providing VALUE in whatever I do will lead me to the right path.

Sunset in Jeju looks like this, so picturesque – i took this outside Isabel’s place.

20Sixteen

Not many things that I want to do this year, only be happy, healthy and fulfilled. It might be easier to put in perspective that everything I do should lead to any of these three things.

Also to celebrate more occasions with family & friends because I find that I remember moments more when celebrated.

2016 I want it to be boring, as constant as possible, as status quo as possible. Too much happened in 2015 for me, so this year taking a notch down and slow down. I think maybe its better not to have any expectations and be surprised.

No huge changes, no big commitments. In all, trust God, let go and let God. And really stop worrying too much and live a non stressful life.

I read my prayer journal and the entire year of 2015 I am just a broken recorder of doubts insecurity and a bag of anxieties lumped into one. After turning the pages I also got sick of reading and writing the same thing, so this year I’ll stop repeating bad stuff and instead pray and write about good stuff.

Also to not think of negative things and obsessing over it. Taking a leaf from Alvin’s book to just do it if I want. and don’t think so much after.

I wasn’t ready for 2016 but now I think it’s great to start the new year with a clean slate, especially a clean mind. :’) I don’t really want to recap 2015 so I will just look forward.

I also embark newly this year on writing 3 things that i did well today, and 3 things I am grateful for. Last year I often worried about things i did not do, and things i sucked at and things i didn’t have. This year, a change of perspective.

We always think of what we didn’t do and also didn’t do well, we forget what we did well. I read that being thankful helps us to focus on positive too, not lack, not what we don’t have but what we have and cherish.

Coincidentally, mom gave me a new diary which says “THANKFUL JOURNAL”. And i think it will be nice to read it at the end of the year !

Big Magic

I always wanted to write about some entrepreneur books that are helpful to me, currently I just picked up Big Magic by the same author who wrote Eat Pray Love. I forgot if I ever read it and even if I did, I forgot the contents. I actually wrote Play instead of Pray initially (you can see what I have been thinking about) 

  
The author is Elizabeth Gilbert, and I am on just the first few chapter. It affirms that we can be creative ourselves.. and we can find things that bring us joy in doing, something which resonates with us. She wrote that we don’t have to quit our job, move across the world to do that. And also in the current chapter I am reading, she affirms that we don’t need a degree to be “legit” in the field we want to be, as long as we work at our craft everyday diligently, we are already for real. I think a lot of us feel that when we want to embark on something new, we always pull ourselves back and say but I don’t have experience or i have no degree / cert to prove. Maybe maybe just perhaps we may not even need that. 

Wedding Day Highlights – White Rabbit Wedding

I wrote this nearly a year ago but did not manage to upload the pictures! HAHAHA. So sorry for the one year delay, and this is going up only because our one year anniversary is this Sunday.

//06 Dec 2014
SOOOO here are the highlights and little details along the way of our Wedding, which may be interesting for Brides to be, or just kaypo you!:)

Alvin & I decided we didn’t want a traditional Chinese banquet and wanted something very intimate, casual and fun. We didn’t look around much because White Rabbit was probably the only place I always had in mind, with the gorgeous stained glass windows, high ceiling, and long table style. So as they call it, White Rabbit Wedding.

We only invited our immediate family, and our closest friends because the space is limited. Also we wanted to cut down on the traveling to and fro (fetching the bride and what not jazz), knowing that Alvin hates anything troublesome and I am just plain lazy and easily tired out. We booked a very very nice suite (Caroline Astor Suite) at St Regis Hotel and the pictures turned out gorgeous because of their room interior and the REAL Christmas Tree at the lobby.

We started the first part of the day at St Regis, in our hotel room and here are the pictures. Woke up around 6.15am because our butler (yes we have a dedicated butler for suite room) brought our breakfast and we were madly rolling out of bed to open the door. Alicia (my make up artist) came shortly and she allowed me to eat before we started the make up. Alvin is super vain, so he had his own make up artist as well, when she arrived with our photographer everything was a whirl wind from there.

 

Pictures with family, and our bridesmaids and groomsmen:’) Spot the Christmas Tree <3 Check out my dad’s tie and the groomsmen ties. I bought those online from China, and the quality is so good, it feels like smooth silk. It only costs me something like US$1 each. My dad and Alvin’s dad get different colour.

St Regis hotel has the most beautiful chandeliers and staircases. Just a tip if you like extra decor and a celebration festive mood, take your photos/ hold your wedding during December when Christmas is just around the corner.

We headed to White Rabbit, it was drizzling by that time and I was pretty disappointed that we didn’t manage to walk through the Rabbit Hole, but the rain stopped later and we took some pictures. The rain made the greenery more lush and it was actually very pretty. As usual, things didn’t go exactly as planned, i think forgot my second dress and my IC. Mel didn’t wake up until 11am or something, and everyone thought she got into an accident or something, she missed out on all the pretty hotel pictures.

Look at how beautiful the long tables and the flowers are. I only met Dawn once to discuss the flowers and left everything else up to her. I chose the colour scheme of flowers for everything, from my hand bouquet, bridesmaids to the corsages to the tables indoor and outdoor, heh. I think I was pretty relaxed about it, I guess I believe that if you get someone to do something, leave it up to them do it so they will do it well. The flowers turned out so amazing, with glass bottles (yes i wanted glass bottles). It really brighten up the whole mood.

Alvin & I wrote our own vows :’) and it is close to 7 years, 24th Dec is our anniversary – the day we got together. I am very happy that we are married although we were hesitant and wanted to push it back to 2015 – mainly our house isn’t ready and we were comfortable being status – quo. We do our own stuff and get together after. We have different friends and hobbies, so it make perfect sense for us.

After doing our ROM, we took some pictures outdoor, we have more pictures then this, its impossible to upload all! Our first walk in.

Instead of wedding montage video, we opted for something more interesting. We asked our best friends to make speeches instead, which was more funny and I really loved it. Jimmy said that now I am married to a vainpot, that Alvin uses luxury skin care products. And Yoges & Mel told everyone that I had once told them that the guy I date would need to eat my leftovers as a requirement, so congratulations to the man who will be eating leftovers for the rest of his life. (kekeke) I love you all, couldn’t be more true then that.

Thats us laughing at what they are saying..

Our second walk in, and hello our wedding cake! The other thing I knew we wanted was a REAL cake. Kenny’s wife have been doing cakes for awhile, she started on the side and look at it! She even let me choose the flavour of our cake and the colour scheme, and the type of sugar flower i wanted. heh. Everyone was so impressed and thrilled that they kept coming up to take pictures of and with the cake. The flavour on the first and second tier was different, we had Earl Gray and Lemon. We had cake for dessert (After the set lunch dessert), and I hardly even got a piece to try because everyone gobbled it down in a second!

Here are some candid shots, and us giving our speech.

I think the happiest person that day could be my mom – she was so happy going around talking to all my friends saying hello. And the funniest thing was that we invited her biological twin sister and everyone (my dad’s side, we are closer to my dad’s side) had NEVER seen her before. They mistaken her twin for being her. The conversation goes

Aunty : Look at that table – looks like Stella right?
Uncle : What are you talking about, it is Stella
Aunty : No, Stella is sitting right in front of you!
Uncle : *Stunned face*
Cousin to my mom : I thought that was you! was wondering how did you changed clothes so quickly!

Can you spot the twins?

And AFTER – was my dream, to introduce single friends to each other. Hahahah check out the waiter that is giving us the weird stare. So introducing Charmaine to the guys!

Throwing the bouquet!

Some pictures of the food.

Thank you for reading and of course attending the special day for us as a couple. All of our family and friends being there, it was important to us that it was enjoyable, had a good time and good foood. We wanted it to be casual and happy, there were so many happy faces and smiles on that day, and laughter. It was such a fun time together with those who are important to us, especially friends who flew all the way to Singapore for our wedding, Patrick and Debbie. I invited a few others as well but they couldn’t make it. I think most important for us was that the wedding really reflected on how we are, and having the most important people t us there, it was like a major party for me and my fantasy was always to have a couple get together after meeting at my wedding. Then we did make a difference, a big one in their life – and during their wedding they would say that they met during our wedding. I hope and I think everyone had so much fun and really enjoyed themselves.

Below is just a review of the vendors we use and the list if anyone needs a reference.

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Songs we used :
Solemnization: Surrender by Sunlonger Feat Chase (link)
First walk in : Everything by Michael Buble (link)
Second walk in : Best Days by Matt White (link)

Hotel : St Regis Hotel
St Regis service was impeccable, from the first impression when we went to take a look at their rooms and also function rooms as we were thinking of doing the Tea ceremony there in the morning. Christine personally brought us around and showed us the suite room as she knew it was important for us to see how it looked like before selecting the type of room we wanted. For us it was space and also visually for photos. Alvin requested for the larger of the suite (they had 2 sizes), and a Botanic Gardens view, and St Regis so kindly reserved it for us, we were so pleased with their first class service. In addition, when we checked in the day itself, she had put a note that it was a special occasion for us, and the butler even brought up chocolates later!

Now Alvin is a convert and fan of Starwood hotels, he told me that I made a good choice suggesting St Regis. Plus we were sooo pleased with the interiors of the hotel, they allowed us to take pictures inside, and there was Christmas Decor all around, December. They had a REAL christmas tree flew in from Canada and you can actually smell the scent.

Alvin & I had stayed in several hotels in Singapore before for staycation, and I am not exaggerating when we say that St Regis is easily the best hotels we stayed in, in terms of service and the warmth and sincerity of the staff. From the front desk to the butler, they were genuine and very accommodating. The only sad thing was that, the second day we wanted to dine at Yan Ting restaurant for Dim Sum but it was fully booked, and we had high tea instead but it really didn’t taste that good. You guys know that I am a person who chooses carefully where I eat. After having Regent’s hotel and even Fullerton hightea was better.

Wedding Lunch venue:
White Rabbit was probably the only place we looked, and we signed a contract and paid the deposit in July 2013 for the entire place, there’s a min sum spending to book the entire place or lesser if you just want part of the place. For us, there was outdoors and indoors, and food wise – the menu turned out to be super, everyone complimented on the beef that day, and the pace of the food was great. We got the wine separately from Wine Connection simply because it costs lesser to buy out of white rabbit even with the corkage charges. In the last minute we decided to add drinks and food after the solemnization, and even still after adding all that up, we were like $200+ short of the min. spending. And Adrian was pretty nice, he waived off the coffee charges which we ordered in the morning.

Wedding Cake:
I contacted Shan (She is Kenny’s wife, Alvin and him are ex-colleagues at Keppel) for the cake and we only discussed on whatsapp and then bam its done. She sort of gets what I like and the theme and everything. Also we had a not so lengthy discussion on what cake would match the frosting taste and if it is weird. I already had in mind that I wanted a real cake because I find it almost ridiculous to have cake cutting in every wedding I been to, but we can’t eat the cake – Yes i am greedy like that! The cake is crazy heavy and also decided that it would serve 70-80pax although we have 120 pax. This is because the norm are big slices, but for weddings usually people have already eaten and only want to eat a small piece, plus it would be so wasteful if its left over. Amazingly, I went around and everyone ate the cake in a jiffy. The cake is moist and tasteful, everyone especially my family loved it and I think I didn’t manage to even try the other flavour. We had Earl Gray and Lemon (1 tier per flavour).

Wedding outfits:
My gown and 2nd dress is from Michelle Hui Min, Bridal Veil. Alvin’s Suit is from the same place, under The Men’s Club. Our outfits were all made to measure, and designed for us. I loved the train behind my gown and went for something plain and classic with crystals on the bustier. For my second dress, I wanted something edgy, check out the tulip cut and high slit at the skirt. I loved both my dresses, undoubtedly, it took me awhile to decide but I think in the end, to trust your own taste and also Michelle was probably very patient with me while Miss-Cannot-Make-up-her-mind had to choose the different designs she did for me. Plus I had to call Tze wen and Mel multiple times (haha!)

Photographer :
We worked with Colin for our Pre-wedding shots in Paris, and we loved how he was – funny and we were very comfortable with him and Rachel. Rachel did our make up then, and they were so patient and made us feel really at ease with them. We could talk about anything and shared our ideas easily. Colin would let me do all sorts of weird photos I wanted, you know me… And best of all, he was always up for something exciting and out of the blue. The wedding day itself, he was in a really good mood. And he was relaxed probably because Alvin and I was. He said that I was probably one of the most relaxed brides ever, and he caught me and shot where i put my leg up on the chair – resting you know? My parents complimented him so much, that he was very hardworking, and knowledgeable. During tea ceremony, he helped to arrange in order of who was eldest, and also if they needed to sit or stand when we offered them tea. I think he was also running around capturing every tiny moment, and we trusted him, so we didn’t bother him one bit! He captured all the best moments of our day and I couldn’t be more grateful to him. It is important to get a photographer you trust and can work well with, because all you are left with after your wedding day are the pictures.

Jewelry :
My jewelry – Diamond Necklace is a gift from my mum, Gold bangle from Alvin’s mom, both as wedding present. Earrings are from Chanel, and our wedding bands are from Cartier.

Decor : Name Tags & Flowers
Mel wrote all my guests names, in a beautiful calligraphy handwriting, and tied ribbons for all. Everyone took photos of her tags and I was so pleased to find many on IG and FB. Leo even tied it on his bag and never took it out since that day!

I met with Dawn for flowers like 3-4 weeks before the wedding, and told her what colour and type of flowers. We only took an hour plus to decide on everything and wala! Look how gorgeous they turned out, I wanted Blue roses and red and white, it was to be a happy and vibrant hand bouquet, and it turned out perfect. I doubt you would find any brides bouquet the way I had mine ;’) Perhaps I should go into decor as well? And most of all, everyone could take home the flowers after, and they were mighty pleased! I initially was not going to have flower decor for the venue, but after looking through pictures and decided that even if it costs us, I would rather have done it then regretting that the pictures turned out blah.

List of vendors
These are a list of vendors that we used for our wedding, feel free to let them know that you read from my blog/ or show them for references on how you want your wedding to look like.

Hotel Venue: St Regis Singapore Hotel
29 Tanglin Road, Singapore 247911
Events Manager : Christine Wang
Phone : (65) 6506 6888
Website : http://www.stregissingapore.com/
Room : Caroline Astor Suite

Wedding Lunch Venue : The White Rabbit
39C Harding Rd, 249541
Events Manager : Annabel Chen / Adrian Chan
Email : annabel.chen@thewhiterabbit.com.sg / adrian.chan@thewhiterabbit.com.sg
Website : http://www.thewhiterabbit.com.sg/

Wedding gowns and suit : Michelle Huimin / The Mens Club
402 Orchard Road, Orchard Delfi #03-24/25 Singapore 238876
Contact : Colin
Phone : (65) 6738 6152
Email : enquiry@bridalveilonline.com
Website : http://www.bridalveilonline.com/

Photographer Pre-Wedding & Actual Day : Timeless Romance
Contact : Colin
Phone : 94891114
Email : Colin@timeless-romance.com
Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/TimelessRomancePhotography

Wedding Cake : The Sweet Escake
Contact : Shan
Phone : 98716479
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thesweetescake

My hair and make up
Contact : Alicia
Phone : 96305301

Alvin’s hair and make up
Contact : Rachel P (Note that Rachel does not usually do actual day make up.)
Phone : 94891114

Florist : Fiorella Bouquet
Contact : Dawn
Phone : 91796689
Email : lovefiorellabouquet@gmail.com
Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/fiorellabouquet

Wine : Wine Connection
Anchor point, B1 , 370 Alexandra Road
Contact : 6476 8997

Do things even if there are no tangible benefits

Ever since I went full time into Just Tangy, I hardly interact much with other people because I don’t have colleagues or bosses. So the only people I really talk to, top number 1 is the courier guys, the cai fan aunties, and some shop owners/merchandisers but not often.

Yesterday one of the courier guys came to pick up parcels and he always like to chat and share random things with me. He told me he used to be in the fashion industry and also went out to open two shops selling ladies dresses / fashion before the blogshop wave hit. After which sales was very bad for him in his shops when online blogshops started so he had to close down his shops and worked in a shipyard company as he needed money to get married as well. Then after which he went into several other business, and he’s now only 33, to me that’s still pretty young.

The thought hit me that what if my husband was like that, or I was like that? He seemed rather happy but also tired from running around collecting parcels. It does seem like not such a glam job. It hit me that what would I think of myself in this situation, doing this and that but never really made a big break or staying in a stable job would give you a stable income and by 33 you be earning a good salary. But then again, I don’t think they are grads and the inertia for grads to go out there and do your own things is actually pretty daunty because you can command a higher salary and what you give up is much more then someone who did not study a lot.

A lot of times, we see the cost benefit this way, we see what we WILL potentially lose out for sure compared to what we MAYBE can get. But we don’t see it other way around. And then again, I hope that I won’t end up being like this, doing this and that but nothing really and regret compared to staying in a job when I look back in life later where I focus and be the best in working whatever I was doing. When I look back later in life, I definitely want to say that it was the best decision I made, that changed something or everything in terms of career, but I would never know.. maybe till it’s too late?

And last night Alvin & I had this convo about him taking his masters and he told me that he asked around for opinions from his seniors if it was worth it. Most of them said its good to have but they are not thinking of it personally because they already have some other accreditation, and most of them have kids and lack of time to commit to doing a masters. In the end I realized from this is that we often seek to do things only because it’s “worth it” meaning it’s the means to the end – we have to get something out of it to classify as “worth it”. I think it’s a very Singaporean thing to only do things that give you tangible benefits and if there isn’t then we don’t do it because it doesn’t make sense. If you gone ahead and do it, people may judge but that’s just because we are Singaporean. There are other intangible benefits to things we do that we often don’t know until we do it, but we end up not doing it in the end. So anyway, we agreed that whether or not its “worth it” he should take it if the opportunity rises next year and I definitely think it’s a great thing for him as well. There isn’t a need to get something back but it sure would open eyes to something more and new.

My point is, if you want to do something, even though it has no value on the surface what so ever, I think it’s still okay to do it. You never know what comes out of it, it could be even someone you met that give you your next job. It could be the people you meet, the things you learn, personal growth is something we cannot put a value or tangible-ness to it. I am hoping as I learn and grow to be more open minded, I won’t have the Singaporean too safe and too scared mentality and I would be able to live life to the fullest.

For awhile now I thought I was being kind of lame to have taken French the first level and then not follow through with the second, why take in the first place? Then I realized that it is perfectly fine to have some self growth and personal learning, not everything has to end up with something I am very good in. It is just one of those things that I wanted to do at that point and i am happy to say that I know a little French. I stopped “beating” myself over it. More recently, I found that others were doing the same, Vivien shared with me that she was going to take up a short app development course when she’s back in UK this month, just to know and learn something new. There’s no outright tangible benefits since she’s not going to do be a developer and do coding business, but it dawned to me that it could just be in us to just want to learn and know more things. The “jack of all trades and master to none” is no longer very relevant today for our generation. Plus things like that are not cheap.

Honestly, sometimes it’s not easy to think horizontally /  laterally because we have been ingrained by our education and conformed into society to be a certain way and tick certain check boxes, if not we will be judged. I spent a good amount of time moving away from what I think I should be based on comparison to my peers etc, and hopefully I am threading on the path I want to be on, or at least the right one to end up on..